Pivotal: of vital or critical importance
I love that word, especially the vital aspect.
Over the years working with women to empower their vision, voice and value, pivotal conversations have played a key role in the coaching relationship as well as my client’s success.
Pivotal conversations are the ones that take courage and daring – the ones that quicken your pulse and catch your breath – the ones that have a meaningful impact on self and others. These are the ones left unspoken leave you feeling regret and diminish your power.
The hurdle to clear is that we are so imprinted by family and society, habituated in our behaviors, and numb to how things truly impact us that it can be difficult to see our own power leaks, speak our truth, or even know what we want.
If you’re like me, I’m sure there have been times when you said yes when you really wanted to say no. Perhaps you’ve sacrificed your personal life or schedule for a demanding client (boss, friend or family member). Maybe you’ve caved on your fees when a client asked for a discount. Or if you’ve ever really wanted something but were too afraid to ask for it, then you know how it feels and the impact of not speaking up and speaking your truth.
Resentment, avoidance and complaining are just a few of the signs and symptoms there is a truth longing to be expressed.
“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter.” Martin Luther King Jr.
Powerful words from someone who dared to speak his truth during extraordinarily difficult times.
I’m sure you’ve felt it – that place inside you that feels like it’s withering every time you suppress your truth – your voice.
How do you know if something matters? … You feel it – painfully or joyfully. You care about it. It makes a difference to YOU.
Whether it’s setting the tone for a client or workplace engagement, establishing clear boundaries and expectations, or asserting your ideas and needs, these pivotal conversations make a world of difference in your life and career. Owning the power of your voice in this way transforms you into a leader – one who is at cause, to be valued, a role model. And I promise you will feel more alive and vital than ever before.
Is it risky to speak your truth? Sure. It’s vulnerable, powerful and has unpredictable yet high potential outcomes. But silence is risky too. It’s practically guaranteed dissatisfaction with negative energy eating you up inside and out.
Which kind of risk would you rather take?